Monday's consult with the surgeon just can't get here soon enough for me. Right now I'm a bundle of anxiety, fear, anger, and insecurity, with a little "salt and pepper" of mania sprinkled on. I'm going so stir crazy about whether or not everything in the arm/wrist is back in place and healing well enough for me to resume some knitting that the condition described by junkies as "wired" comes to mind. I don't care if knitting re-entry hurts some; I do care that it's not actually going to be re-injuring the broken bones or do harm. I feel like one of the chimpanzee's in that Jane Goodall Nature film that just starts screams as he picks up a big stick and pounds it on the grass.
We've also had a wicked scary two days. Jazz got very ill with the heat, and was having something that resembled heat stroke. He seems now to be fine, after some more episodes today, but we are watching him pretty carefully. I know that the world is full of a lot of hurt, and he is only a dog. Still, this little guy is so dear to us that we get pretty horrified if it looks like he won't make it to his tenth birthday later on in June.
Also, May went by me without any green things! It just flew right out the window and kept going! I will try to find some good looking green things for the May Project Spectrum and post them. I can now handle the camera again. Salad mix, anyone? Dial soap and tomatillo sauce? Ooooo I think I can do this!
"Y" is coming, too, in the retro-grade alphabet stew. It won't be yarn, though I can spin some good ones, especially about how Locomotive mountain got way out there in Southern Arizona.
Tomorrow is My DH's mother's birthday, and all the family who are in town are going to help her celebrate it. It should be fun, and it may be cooling off a little bit, too, which cannot hurt!
Two magazines came, back issues of Knitting from Interweave Press, which I am now going to subscribe to again. Shipped to your home and NO Gasoline expended trying to find a copy somewhere in the county! Anyway, The lovely embossed leaves sock pattern is in one. Ooooo! Another Green thing!
I read your post and was having vivid flash backs to Dec! Oh, the English language cannot describe what I know you are going through! I had forced myself to be a good patient and a wife with grit and humor, but the last couple of weeks was a trial for DH, the cats and me. When he told me that he will be out of town on the day that I was to get the casts off, I wanted to scream and cry and do the best rendition of a harpy. God bless my dear 85 year old neighbor who drove me to the Dr. (She doesn't believe in drinking, but she was happy to pour about 3 drinks worth of whiskey for me to make it through the next couple of days!)
ReplyDeleteYes, you will take a step or two backward because you won't have the splint for support anymore. And you may get into a blue blue funk. This is natural and it will pass. I know it won't keep you down. You may find that things aren't/won't be like the were before, hey! no biggie! Adapt! Go with the flow.
Play with your yarn, knitting, spinning. Play in the garden...plant green things that grow and show the glories of Nature. Play like you are 10 again. When I feel down and just to adult for my own good, I pull out a Philip Pullman or a Harry Potter and read. It's nice for a middle aged old bag to feel like 10 again...when everything is possible and when the "harsh side" of life was nonexistent. We need to hang onto that innocence.
Have a good time at the party, give Jazz a good healthy skritch for me! And give yourself one too! You both deserve it.
Thinking about you at the party today -- ours went well although cold (56) and pouring - the tent didn't leak LOL -- Poor Jazz I know how you are feeling with this - and am sending out good thoughts for Jazz and you. One more day to see the doctor - hang in there - do everything they say - I love Meribeths post as I remember all the things she talked about and totally agree with the Harry Potter idea - wasn't 10 a great year - I want to go back a couple of times a year personally. Line up the things you want to do - design some changes in your mind and maybe write them out so you will remember - play with different yarns to figure what you want to do with them - and above all go slow when you are given the go ahead. Before you know it (honestly when you look back on it it won't seem to have taken as long - although now it seems like forever!!) you will be knitting along and thinking of this all as a bump in the road...
ReplyDeleterho
Trish, That is really scary! Poor doggies, poor you and poor, chagrined DH. Sometimes we don't feel the heat because we are higher off that hot pavement and we are virtually hairless.
ReplyDeleteIt's also exactly what happened to Jaz, though not from a walk but just the heat itself. He was foaming and staggering but in fits like. Then he'd be perfectly alright within seconds of that, prancing and doing a playstance. Then it would happen again a little later. We gave him a lot of water two times when it happened. It was like he'd forgotten to drink water. We thought, "How on earth can a dog forget he needs water?" but that's why I was thinking he may have had a stroke during the night. He was actually afraid of me, like he didn't recognize me for a while, too. Thank Heaven he goes for his full summer cut this Wednesday. Expect a cold snap, of course. *rueful smile*
Meribeth, thank you, thank you! You probably saved me from slipping into a blue,blue funk by sharing your experiences. I don't know how the heck someone survives two broken wrist at the same time, as you can do NOTHING for yourself except maybe walk to the next "aide" station and be seated. I will get out all the Little House on the Prairie book series and read them. I wonder where they are? I have been sick about not being able to spin, spindle or wheel, or to work in my garden at the height of Spring no less.
The knitting part I know I will be able to do ( but slower). The spinning. I hold with my left hand and the right drafts and pinches. The Garden is like a death trap, according to DH. He just doesn't want me out there. Well, now's the time for me to get a few things I want, like a real potting bench, eh? :D The safest place is under the patio shade cover.
All this and Pepe was sick, too. But the bird is fully recovered. Being outside and in the sun cheered the little guy up a lot. Nearly all his little friends over the fence have been sold off. The big aviaries are going empty, now. I miss the sweet songs of my neighbor's little birds. I think it was fear of the bird flu that probably prompted her to end her hobby, though I haven't talked to her about it.
Golly! It's fun to gab away over here isn't it!
Hi Rho, I missed you because I was taking so long over the last post. You speak the truth, right now it all seems like it's going to take forever and I'll run out of time. I will get ALL the yarn out and play with it. :D
ReplyDeleteThanks for the suggestion of doing some garden designing. That will help a lot, really. That's enjoyable. Also, I will remember to go slow, and OBEY, as Trish said. Listen to my Dr., absolutely.
DH watches me like a hawk because he knows I've always been a dare devil but one who has now gotten clumsy. My sister, he and I were talking on Friday..she complimented me on the "English Garden" that is developing all on it's own in the raised bed.... Anwyay, one thing I told her is that I try to look in the mirror more -despite a mirror aversion - to remind myself of my real age. Oddly, I still feel like a 25 year old in my mind. The visual of the grandmother's face, surrounded by gray hair, staring back at me helps lend credence to the pleas for me to slowwwww down when I moooooove. The brain being too quick is why I ended up in this mess, because the body just doesn't react as fast as the brain thinks it should. The Brain needs to know it's dealing with a 63 year old's set of motor skills. I've always been quick and impulsive, not it's time to face reality.
I'm glad the party was fun and the tent didn't leak. lol. We have a little covered patio where we are going but it's closer to the ocean so cooler, by far, than here. And I'm hoping there will be cake. Yum!
I will be crossing all fingers and toes this morning, hoping that the doctor tells you everything that you want to hear.
ReplyDeleteGive Jazz a milkbone for me, and a hug (for both of you).